Grape Juice for Kiddush
Adults may choose grape juice over wine for a number of reasons: designated drivers, those taking medications that interact negatively with alcohol, those with health concerns for which alcohol is ill advised, pregnant women, those with family histories of alcoholism, or simple personal preference. Alcohol consumption is dangerous for some, and this is particularly true for individuals in addiction recovery.
Grape juice should therefore always be offered at kiddush (or whenever wine is present). Doing so sends an important message that you and your community are allies to Jewish individuals and families facing addiction or in recovery.
As a prayer leader, referencing “fruit of the vine” rather than “wine” is a verbal cue that making kiddush does not require the consumption of alcohol. In addition, we suggest simple steps to clearly differentiate between wine and grape juice if both are served. For example, use red grapes for wine and white grapes for juice consistently from week to week and from holiday to holiday.
Shofar blasts as a metaphor for recovery
The Hebrew verb for “improve,” l’shafer, has the same root as the word shofar. The sounding of the shofar calls us to improve - improve our relationship with the Sacred, improve our relationship with one another, and improve our relationship with ourselves. The journey from addiction to recovery is not always an easy journey. The sounding of the shofar can serve as a metaphor for the spiritual pathways that lead to recovery. The teki’ah (a long, strong blast) represents one pathway to recovery. For some people, one time in treatment, ongoing participation in one mutual support group, or even one radical life change is what brought them from addiction to recovery. Shevarim (a series of three short broken blasts) represents another pathway to recovery in which some people need a few times in treatment, a few different mutual support groups to find a best fit, or even a few radical life changes to bring them from addiction to recovery. Teru’ah (nine short staccato notes) represents a pathway to recovery in which some people find that it’s not just one thing, but many things in rapid succession - treatment, mutual support groups, continuing care, different people, places, and things - that brought them from addiction to recovery. The teki’ah g’dolah (a sustained long, strong blast) represents recovery itself. Recovery sustains us from our first breath to our last and calls us towards continual improvement of ourselves and our world.
Recovery Celebration Ceremony
Birth and rebirth are central themes of the High Holidays and of addiction recovery. Many people in recovery celebrate sober birthdays (the anniversary of a person’s sobriety) in recognition of the fact that recovery has given them a new lease on life, or perhaps has saved their life altogether. Sober birthdays are often celebrated in 12-Step fellowships, during which members are given a cake on their sober birthdays. This is sometimes known as “taking your cake” or “getting my cake.” At this time of year, honey cake may be given in honor of our tradition. May all recovery be sweet!
Some individuals have dietary boundaries as part of their sobriety. For example, those in recovery from overeating may have identified foods high in sugar as problematic for them. We therefore suggest a “Recovery Celebration Ceremony” that allows for flexibility based on the sobriety needs of the individual being honored.
Therefore, prior to planning a Recovery Celebration Ceremony at home or in synagogue, please speak with the individual who is to be honored about food-related boundaries. Alternative celebratory foods may be offered in celebration of their recovery, or a token of recognition and honor such as a floral bouquet may be given instead.
In synagogue, one might say: “(Name/s of participants) I invite you to step forward and receive your (name the food or alternative item) in celebration of the anniversary of your Recovery. May you find strength in following your program, and from the people, places, and things that support Recovery and may you be guided on your journey by a power greater than yourself. Yom Echad B’chol Pa’am—One day at a time.”
At home one might: consider having cake or an alternative celebratory food for dessert at one of your Shabbat meals to celebrate addiction recovery…that of someone you know or for all who are living a life free of addiction! If you are sharing your Shabbat meal with someone in recovery, consider offering a token of celebration (such as a bouquet of flowers or a festive balloon) to honor their recovery.
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